To write the paragraph on appearance

Key Stage 2

English

Pandas - Non-chronological report

﻿Hi everybody, welcome back to our unit writing in non-chronological report on Pandas. This lesson is really exciting, we are going to be writing the paragraph on the Panda's appearance and its characteristics. And let's get started. Our learning objective today is to write the appearance paragraph of a non-chronological report on Pandas. On the agenda, we're going to start with a writing warm-up, then we're going to re-cap the plan and the facts that we could make wrote down in our plan from the previous lesson, then we're going to do a shared write before you go off and do your own independent writing of the paragraph. In this lesson, you're going to need an exercise book or some paper, pencil or pen, and really importantly the notes from your planning lesson, which you're going to use to help you write this paragraph. If you haven't got any of this, now's your chance to go get it and if you can, try and find a nice calm and quiet space, where it's best for you to concentrate. Pause the video now, if you need to sort any of this out. So for the writing warm-up, you'll need your blank paper or exercise book and a pen or pencil. So for the writing warm-up, I want you to have a look at the picture of the Panda and write a sentence about this picture, which uses a viewpoint word. A viewpoint word, I always, I hope you helped remember the definition of it, is that it gives you your point of view, about the rest of this, about the sentence, about what you're saying about in the sentence. So for example, interestingly comma, pandas have black patches around their eyes in order to recognise other pandas. The main clause, in the sentence is the fact that pandas have black patches around their eyes and your viewpoint word tells the reader that you find this interesting. Interestingly comma, and then the rest of the sentence. What's important to note is that there needs to be a comma, after the word interestingly or after the viewpoint word. I wonder if you can think of any of the viewpoint words which could be appropriate. Maybe amazingly, fascinatingly, incredibly. All of these are viewpoint words, 'cause they give you a point of view about the rest of the sentence. Or about the information within the sentence. So in your analysis, you now to pause your video and write a sentence, using the facts you know about Panda and include a viewpoint word. Off you go. Okay, hopefully all of you have written a sentence which includes a viewpoint word about the panda. Now, because there's not a teacher in the room with you, you're going to do your own editing and marking and check back through it for correct punctuation, and whether you've got any words you think probably you need to check the spelling of and correct them if need be. Just having to thank me about marking, let's have a look at my sentence below and see if, have I got everything you need to make the sentence accurate. Amazingly, that's my viewpoint word. Have I got a full stop, a capital letter at the beginning. Yup. And a comma following the viewpoint word. That's both of those things are there. Amazingly comma, Pandas spend 14 hours a day eating bamboo in order to have enough energy. I made sure I didn't have a capital letter after that comma, and I made sure there was a full stop at the end. None of the words that are proper nouns. So I didn't need a capital letter in the middle of the sentence. If you need to pause the video and go back and check through your sentence for any error so you could correct. So before we go onto writing up and paragraph, I thought it'd be good idea to re-cap the plan that we created before, so that you're feeling really confident about knowing what you need to include when you go to write the paragraph about the panda's appearance. What facts can you remember about the pandas appearance? Pause the video, now maybe you could tell the person who's in a room with you or just jot down some ideas. What facts can you remember off the top of your head? Okay, hopefully you've had a little think. Things I recalled are it's thick fur, and the purpose of this thick fur was that it was to keep the pandas warm in those cold mountains of central China. Also another fact was their black and white fur, and the reason, the purpose of this fur was so that it can camouflage and hide from the predators in both the snow and the shadows. We discussed about how that's kind of a survival characteristic of theirs, isn't it, the fact that they can hide from those predators trying to attack them. Their large, broad molar teeth, is those huge teeth at the back is one of the key characteristics and the purpose of these teeth so that they can crush the tough bamboo, the bamboo which makes up 99% of their diet. So it's essential that they can digest it properly. So they need these huge teeth to be able to do that. Their black eyes, a really distinct feature of Pandas and something that's really unique to them, which means that it helps them to recognise other pandas 'cause they recognise the other mammals which have the same eye features. And then finally the enlarged wrist bone. We spoke about enlarge that word within the word large, meaning its way. It's really big, really big part of that arm, the wrist, and it's works like an opposable thumb so that the Panda can crush that bamboo which they eat. So now we are going to do a shared write. Normally in a class, shared right would be done by the teacher on the board would be getting lots of ideas from the children in the class. Instead, I'm going to kind of share my ideas as I write them. And if you want to, you can jot down anything that you think you'd like to include. So what should we include in our writing in this paragraph? I've made it success criteria, which is something you might be familiar with from school. These are used to help us decide. Have we been is to help us assess whether we've been successful in our writing? So these I'm going to have in the back of my mind when I'm doing the shared right, to think these are the kinds of things that I need to be including. So on our success criteria today, we have got, I have used subject specific vocabulary. I have used a who/which relative clause. I have used a range of formal 'and'/ 'but', and causal conjunctions, and I have used accurate ambitious punctuation. I'm going to have this at the top of my screen so that when I'm doing my writing, I can think back and look back, refer back to that, to make sure I'm including these things. At the end, I can then go through my writing and tick off the success criteria to assess how successful I've been. So as you can see, I've put my success criteria at the top left corner. So it's something that I have always got to refer back to, to help us start, but now let's start our shed, right? It's the first thing I need to do. And I think back to my features are for that features lesson is that I know every paragraph has to start with a subheading. Now this paragraph is all about the appearance of the pandas. So I'm simply going to give it the subheading appearance. If you are handwriting this, you'd maybe want to use a ruler to underline, but I'm just going to use the underlying feature on the PowerPoint, on the presentation. So our subheading is appearance. First thing I need to write about is, what am I wanting to think about? I know I want to include some subject specific vocabulary. I'm not sure now if I'm going to use the rest of floors, it might be something I'll come into it later. I know that the most important thing, most distinct thing about the Panda's appearance is that black and white fur. So I think that would be a good way to start the paragraph. As always, I'll start my paragraph with an indent, a few, a little bit inside from the margin to signify the start of new paragraph. Pandas, oh I made a mistake that's okay. Pandas are well hyphen known A hyphen between well and known because they are joined together, are well known for their recognisable. I'm going to use that adjective we looked at in the planning lesson to describe, pandas that recognisable, meaning it's really familiar, they're recognisable black and white fur and in particular, you need a comma after in particular because that is a parenthesis. It means it also needed before the in particular is the parenthesis that could be taken out and then put back in again. And in particular, the black circles around their eyes And checking my spelling of their, T-H-E-I-R because it's eye that belonged to them. So their eyes, this isn't in my success criteria, but I really like using a rhetorical question in a non-chronological report. Cause I think it hooks the redirect. Did you know, was a great way to start as a great sentence starter when you're about to tell a really interesting facts. So did you know, they use these patches, they I'm actually going to get rid of they, and take, oh, how could I refer to these pandas in a different way? Give them an alternative now. So we're not always calling them the same thing. Did you know these magnificent mammals? You can see I'm making spelling mistakes and that's okay. I just go back and correct them, which is something that you can all do. Magnificent E-N-T not A-N-T. Did you know these magnificent mammals use these patches. This is the really interesting fact that I only learned the other day. Use these patches to help them recognise other pandas. Now this is a rhetorical question. Yes, it might not being actually answered by anyone, but you still need to include that all important question mark at the end. To find back to my success criteria, I now think I could take the final row. It says I've used accurate and ambitious punctuation. Cause I've used that question Mark, which I think is quite ambitious. A former conjunction is really important and really good way to link sentences together. So it's smooth. So it has a kind of flows in a smooth way. A formal one could be furthermore or in addition to this, to build on from the fact that we've just written, in addition to this, just in addition to this, being a comma at the end. A thick fur for, what the fact we learned about the thick fur? It allows them to hide from their prey by enabling or allowing, I'm going to choose enabling, 'cause I think it's just that bit more sophistical formal and sophisticated, enabling them to camouflage. You were to spell that camouflage has got that own U. You kind of silent U. Camouflage in the snow. It's not just the snow though, is it? That's what the white does. The Black fur allows them to camouflage in the shadows. I need to get that in, in addition to this, they're thick fur allows them to hide from their prey by enabling them to camouflage in the snow and also the shadows. A whole point, whenever I write, I always check, read through it as I go along. I don't just leave it to the very end to check because it's just a really great way of reminding selves what you've written. So you don't repeat yourself and also just checking it all is making sense. I'm going to put this a little bit bigger now for you to have a read through. You can pause the video and if there's anything that you really like, that you think you would want to include, now's your chance to jot it down onto your plan, so pause the video and have a re-read through what we've written so far. Okay. So carrying on with this paragraph, I'm looking back at my success criteria and I'm thinking, Oh, I haven't included who, which relative clause yet? Just something I think I know I want to include. So I'm going to speak, talk about it in terms of the bamboo and the way that they features are designed for them to help them eat as much bamboo as they can. So bamboo, the extra bit of information I want to say is about how it takes up 90% of their diet. So I'm going to use that in a relative clause. Bamboo which, the relative pronoun, takes up 99% of their diet. You need a comma at the end and at the comma at the beginning before the which, because it's the relative clause. Is very tough and hard to break down. So, and then this is leaving on the appearance fact. So pandas have, adjectives to describe the site of that jaw. We could use large, but I'm also thinking back to the lesson where we gathered data to describe the pattern. I think I might use sizable. Has sizeable jaws in order to break, Not to break, maybe to 'cause I've used the word break earlier in order to crush the plant. This could be a good opportunity to mention the wrist, the fact of their wrist, because that is related to the bamboo and how it has to crush down. So I'm going to use a form conjunction to link this together and to build on this fact. So I'm going to use furthermore. Furthermore, it's not just their large jaws, it's also their wrist, isn't it? So furthermore, pandas could call them pandas or maybe we refer to them as something else. The mammal or the bear have enlarged wrist bones to help them break. We've used the word break, maybe shutter. It's more, it's a difference its a different synonym, to shutter the bamboo to help them digest it. I'm going to make this a little bit bigger so we can look back through it next to our success criteria. So just reading it back quickly now, I'm pretty confident I can tick off at least three of the success criteria roles, subject specific vocabulary. I think we can definitely take as we've got bamboo, we've got jaws, we've got wrist bones. These are all specific to have this paragraph. I've used a who, which relative clause. Yup. For the very first line bamboo, which takes up much 90% of their diet. And we've also used correct punctuations. We've used the commas accurately. So we could take that the bottom row as well. And I've used a formal 'and'/ 'but', or causal conjunction I've used furthermore and I've also used in order to, so I can almost give myself two ticks. The success criteria is really useful because now I can go back and check, have I done enough to make myself be successful? So it's great to have back. So now it's time for you to do your own independent write of the paragraph on the appearance. Hopefully you're feeling pretty confident after doing a whole lesson planning and then the shared rights together. You're feeling ready to get started. So let's just really quickly re-cap. What should you include in this paragraph? You can have to have a subheading which will be appearance or characteristics or features and purpose update, but remember it's the paragraph on there of appearance. viewpoint word, maybe amazingly, interestingly, incredibly. Only those words which end with LY and give your point of view about the rest of the sentence. Correct punctuation, checking for capital letters, full stops, commas in the right places and subject specific vocabulary. Words that are to do with the pandas appearance. What could you include if you wanted to challenge yourself? Maybe a relative clause or who, which relative clause. A colon either to introduce a list or to separate clauses within a sentence. A rhetorical question and formal conjunctions and, but, or causal. So just thought here's some sentence ideas to get you started in case you're not quite feeling confident when you've gotten the blank page in front of you. And I can feel a bit stressful sometimes, but if you want to, some sentences ideas could be, you could use the viewpoint word interestingly and start your paragraph with, interestingly, the Panda's black eyes, and then carry on talking about that. Or you could start with a formal conjunction, the causal conjunction, due to that black and white fur, pandas are. And then you could carry that on. If you'd like to, you can absolutely use those sentences to help you. I would suggest pausing the video here though and leaving the success criteria on the screen. So, just like I was doing in the shared right. I can refer back to it, make sure I'm including everything we need to include. When you think you have included something, you could give yourself a little mental tick or if you want to do, you could even write out your own success criteria at the top of your page. I would pause the video now and have this here so that you can get started with your writing. Off you go. Okay welcome back. I hope you've all enjoyed writing the paragraph on the appearance. We've had a great lesson, say lots to do. We've done a writing warmup. We've recapped our plan. We did a shared right? And then you've hopefully all gone off and done an independent write of the paragraph on appearance. Congratulations, the lesson is done. You've completed it. If you'd like to, I'm sure your parents or carers would love to see your work. And if you'd like to, if you'd really like to send it, show it off, then you can ask them to share your work on Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter tagging at Oak National or the hashtag Learn with Oak. well done for brilliant lesson everybody and see you soon.

To write the paragraph on appearance

To write the paragraph on appearance

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UnitEnglish / Pandas - Non-chronological report

English