To write an ending that satisfies

Key Stage 1

English

Baba Yaga: created story (openings)

﻿Hello Super storytellers and welcome to this English lesson. This is lesson 10 of unit five. It's our last lesson of this unit. My name is Ms Cashin, and I'm so proud of the work that's been done so far through this unit especially on amazing writing. Today we are going to be finishing our very own recycled story. I can't wait to find out how your main character escapes from the monster and what their magic objects turn into. So let's see what we are going to do in our lesson to get ready for our amazing writing. We going to start today's lesson with a spelling activity then we going to talk through our ending with our story map from lesson two. If you have your story map brilliant, but if you don't you don't need to worry. Then we going to box up the ending of our story and then we going to do our independent writing where we write an ending that really satisfies the reader. These are the things you're going to need for today's lesson. You going to need an exercise book or some paper. It would be amazing if you could get some plain paper for your box plan and some lined paper for your writing and actually for our spelling activity as well. You could also use this time to make sure that you have your story map. You're going to need something to write with a pen or a pencil and you're going to need of course, your pretty brain. If you need to go and get any of those things you can pause the video now and go and get them. Well done Superstars we are all ready for our learning. So let's get cracking with our spellings. We have been learning about contractions in this unit. I've got some contractions here. Let's read them my turn your turn. 'Shouldnt' Oh, I went to read it but I've noticed a mistake. They should say, "Shouldnt, wont and Im." But they're missing their apostrophe's. Oh dear, can you pause the video, and write down these contractions to the apostrophe in the right place. So pause the video now, and see if you know where the apostrophe goes? Well done, so you could spell it let's see if they were in the right place. There they are with the apostrophe so much better. So should not becomes shouldn't, and our apostrophe replaces where that 'o' would have gone. Will not doesn't become willn't it becomes won't. I won't do that, but we still have our apostrophe between the 'n' and the 't' from not and I'm our 'a' sound is gone. I am becomes I'm so our apostrophe replaces the 'a'. You can pause the video again and see if you need to give yourself three big ticks or if there are any that you got wrong and you could write them down correctly so you make the same mistake next time. Well done super spellers what a brilliant start to our lesson. Now, you can watch me talk through the ending of my story with my story map and you will have a go at doing the same. Right Super storytellers. We are going to talk through the ending of our story, and I've got my story map here to help me so I can remember what happens at the end of my story. So I've got my story map here from lesson two that I've been using all the way through, and our last lesson we got up to when the monster realises that the precious thing is being taken back and they shout and they scream. We are now going to be telling the story from when our characters starts running and running and running and they're going to throw all those precious things over their shoulders and they will turn into something that stops the monster. Remember the first two things don't stop the monster completely they just delay them a bit but our last object will be successful. I've spoken this through a few times let me move that down so you can see it I've spoken through a few times so I'm just going to be just talking through it once but you might have to a few times till you are really happy with your storytelling language. Okay. Ely ran and she ran and she ran and the yeti was just about to grab her. At that moment she remembered her stone. She threw it over her shoulder and it became a thick brick wall. The yeti stopped, but then punched through the wall. Ely ran and she ran and she ran and the yeti was close behind her just as he was just about to grab her she remembered her shell. She threw her shell over her shoulder, and it became a slippery icy lake. The yeti slipped and slided but kept his balance and kept on running. Ely ran and she ran and she ran, but the yeti was just about to grab her at that moment she remembered her berries she threw them over her shoulder, and a wall of entangled spiky thorned branches appeared. The yeti stopped and stared he couldn't go through them he couldn't go around them he couldn't eat them he couldn't smash them so he just went home. Ely ran, ran, ran all the way back to her igloo. She put Busta down At that moment her parents came home. "How was your day?" Asked her mom. "Fine," said Ely. I'm really pleased to be ending my story, and now I've had a chance to talk through I'm definitely ready to go, and do some writing about it. Now that you've seen me through to the end of my story using my map it's time for you to have a go as well. Remember you can think through it speak through it as many times as you like you could even jot down one or two words as you go through it if you would like to. All our stories are different, so you're not going to be telling the story of Ely and the yeti you're going to be telling your own recycled story but I've got some essence this is here to help you so I've got they ran, and they ran and they ran, but the monster was close behind. At that moment they remembered, and then they threw at it over their shoulder and you can use those to help you if you would like, but I'm sure you've got lots of brilliant story telling language of your own. You can pause this video now to go and talk through your ending with your story map. Well done Super storytellers. We are all ready to now box up our ending because you've already got it in your head. We going to box it up, and think about the purpose of each section. Remember we want our ending to be really satisfying. You're going to watch me do it first, and then you will have a go. For my box plan state I have got seven pictures which is quiet a lot to get on one piece of paper I have colons for that. So I've got one, two, three, four, five, six and seven. I've already done my pictures and the way I've boxed this up is I got my character running and running and running they run and they run and they run until they remembered the stone. Oh, I said that wrong actually, this is why I need to look at my pictures so carefully. They ran and they ran and they ran, but the yeti was close behind just as they are about to grab them they remembered the stone. What's the purpose of this section Likely the purpose is for the reader to feel tense. You want to build some tension here because they'll be worried that Ely is going to be snatched and eaten. So you want some tension there that's the purpose she remembered the stone, and threw it over her shoulder, and a strong brick wall appeared We really like that description I just have to write that down I could use it later. It's a strong and I might say strong, thick wall strong, big wall or I quite like thick makes it sound like it's going to be really hard or actually I think tall and strong tall say all standing wall. Strong, tall wall but the yeti smashes it. After he smashed it with his enormous arms say smashed. I'm going to write that down that word to use for later. So here our reader is going to feel a bit of hope a bit relief because they'll see the wall that the yeti can't get around but then they'll realise, "Oh, dear. We are back to some more tension, because he's still running." I'm going to place here hope we want them to feel hopeful that the wall will stop the yeti but it won't. Okay, we have some more tension here because our character is still running and running and running and they can't get away yet. Ely ran and she ran and she ran, but the yeti was close behind her at that moment she remembered the shell. I'm going to put the conjunction but in both of these boxes because that's going to be really important for my sentences and I don't want to forget that important sentence. But the less I already know that the monster is still there. She threw it over her shoulder and it became or how could you describe this lake? This is another moment of hope for our reader. We want them to think that the lake is going to stop or the ice frozen over ice is going to stop our yeti. I might describe it as slippery. A slippery sheet of ice. That will really help my reader feel hopeful they'll think, "The yeti is not going to get over that." and I really like doing box plans where she has a different idea I thought that the yeti might stand on the ice and crack it. Like say yeti stamped on the ice and it break. We are now back to some more tension because the yeti is still there our reader will be thinking, "Oh, my goodness Ely and Busta are definitely going to be eaten. So she ran and she ran and she ran, but really important conjunction there the yeti was close behind just as he was about to grab her she remembered the berries. She threw them over her shoulder and it became the thorns. I'm really pleased I didn't use the word thick to describe the wall because I want to describe it here. I'm going to say, A thick block of entangled thorns. For I really like that the thick I'm not sure about the word block. I might use them all of them all again because it's like a wall of thorns and that makes it sound like it won't be able to get through. A thick wall of sharp, entangled thorns. I'm going to think about my spelling of thorns going to use my sounds okay or thorns okay and what did that monster do? He stopped and stared. Stopped and stared and that's going to be really important our reader is still feeling some hope that's the purpose of this section they're feeling hopeful and now our monster stopped instead. I put question marks around him as well because he's so confused and then this is the moment of relief and I think that's what makes this a satisfying ending. Our reader will be so relived that they have gotten away. I think it's a moment of relief and may be calm. They run all the way back to the igloo and at that moment their parents came home from work. Mom's going to ask Ely, "How's your day?" And Ely is going to say, "Fine." I don't think they need any key words or phrases there. I just need to make sure I remember everything in my picture so I finish my ending in already satisfying way. Okay Superstars. Now that you've seen me box up the ending of my story. It's time for you to do the same. Make sure you've got a clear picture for each part because you saw how that really helped me when I forgot some details about my story telling, and then make sure that you write down a few keywords or phrases that you really really want to use. All that powerful storytelling language is going to really help you to have an ending that satisfies. If you wanted to challenge yourself you could also think about the purpose of each section is it a hopeful moment? Are you building tension? Are you building fear? Or is this the moment that our reader is relived or really satisfied with the way that our story has ended. So you can pause the video now and go into your box plan. Well done Super storytellers you have got so much brilliant story telling language in your head now all ready to go. It's time for us to write and ending that satisfies I'm so excited. You are going to see me write the start to my ending, and then you do yours independently. Okay, Super storytellers. I have already got my first sentence from my first cut of my box plan. I'm going to read it. Capital 'S' for she. She ran and she ran and she ran, but the hideous yeti was close behind her. My reader will be feeling really tense and I included that important conjunction 'but'. What do we need to write next? That's right she remembers the stone. I'm going to say just as he was about to grab her just capital 'J'. Just as he was that's one of our tricky words we just need to know it w-a-s brilliant. Just as he was about to grab her grab going to use my sound 'grab'. Fantastic. Just as he was about to grab her, she remembered the stone. Well, I wonder if I can even describe that stone. She remembers the special stone I could call it or the magical stone or the precious stone or she doesn't know if it's magical yet. I might call it the special stone she remembered the special stone. I'm going to read back my sentence to check it makes sense before I move on. Just as he was about to grab her, she remembered the special stone. Fantastic. Right. What is she going to do? She is going to throw it over her shoulder. She threw it threw there are different ways we can spell threw let's check this one threw there we go. She threw it over her shoulder and it became I'm actually going to write and again there I think I rushed my hand writing a bit and it became I want to describe my wall in a way that make it sound like we'll be able to get through it because I wanted to give my readers some hope. Oh, yes that was it a strong tall wall and it became a strong, tall wall because I got my two adjectives I got my comma in between there. Now, I want my reader to think that the yeti won't get through so he's going to stop then he's going to smash it. I'm going to say. The yeti stopped but I want to use that conjunction again so here the yeti stopped my reader will be thinking, "Oh, great the yeti stopped." but and they'll be thinking, "Oh, dear what's he going to do?" The yeti stopped, but then smashed the wall. I could say smashed the wall apart smashed the wall into tiny pieces so I could use that shuttered the wall. That would be another verb. I can say that then smashed the wall apart. I've had a few long sentences I'm going to use a short sentence to end this part of my ending. I'm just going to say he kept running and my reader will go, "He's kept running. Oh, my goodness." Here we go. He kept running. Right. I'm going to read it through to check if it makes sense. She ran and she ran and she ran but the hideous yeti was close behind her. Just as he was about to grab her, she remembered the special stone. She threw it over her shoulder and it became a strong, tall wall. The yeti stopped but then smashed the wall apart! He kept running. I am so pleased with the writing I did for the ending of my story and I'm really looking forward to finishing it later especially when I get to the part where my reader will know that Ely is safe and I think that'll be an ending that really satisfies my reader. Now, it's time for you to write the ending of your very own recycled story. If you would like to you could just write the part that I did but if you were to challenge yourself today you could use your box plan to write the whole ending. Remember to use this toolkit to help you to check each sentence have you got a capital letter and have you got punctuation might be a full stop or an exclamation mark like I used in my writing. You might even have a question mark. Then think to yourself does this sentence make sense and the other question is to think have you built tension and then written a satisfying ending. I used tension. I built tension sorry by using the conjunction 'but'. I left my reader thinking that are things to be okay but then it wasn't. I thought these sentences to help you when you pause the video you can look at these if you want to or you could choose not to and be more independent with your writing. Remember to use your box plan 'cause that's going to help you the most. You could pause the video now and go into your amazing writing. Well done Super storytellers you have finished your very own recycled story you were just such a story telling superstar. Amazing. I have got a challenge. Which is your favourite transformation? That means which is your favourite bit when the object becomes something that stops the monster can you find your favourite bit in your story, and underline that bit? My favourite bit was definitely the wall 'cause I liked that the stone can become something that is made out of stone. I really liked that and I liked that my description of it is a strong, tall wall made my reader think that everything was going to be okay, and then it wasn't. So pause the video now and see if you can think or which of my transformations is my favourite then underline it. Well done Superstars I can't believe you have the energy for a challenge you are amazing. I would love to read some of your stories especially if now I could read a whole story that would make me so happy. So remember you can share your work with Oak National. If you'd like to please ask your parents or carer to share your work on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter tagging @OakNational and #LearnwithOak. That is the end of our unit you have done such amazing work and I hope you enjoy some of the other units that you are going to do with Oak National. Bye Superstars.

To write an ending that satisfies

To write an ending that satisfies

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UnitEnglish / Baba Yaga: created story (openings)

English