To plan the second part of a narrative scene

Key Stage 2

English

Oliver - Narrative writing

﻿Hello, Miss Vincent here for your English lesson today. So in today's lesson, we're going to continue looking at a build up scene from the story of Oliver Twist from the film version. And we're going to be planning out some ideas of vocabulary and speech so that in lesson 10, we can write up this part of the story using lots of detail and lots of speech. So I'm excited to watch this clip with you, this part of the film and to come up with lots of ideas, ready for our writing in the following lesson. So let's get started. So here's our agenda for today. We're going to start off with a quick writing warmup on show not tell. We're going to watch the clip to remind ourselves of the part that we're planning today. We're going to retell the story. And then finally, we're going to move on to our planning. In this lesson, you will need an exercise book or a piece of paper, pencil or a pen and a rule, if you have one, don't worry if you don't. If there's anything that you need to go and get, then please pause the video, go and get it and press play when you're ready to move on. Okay, great. Let's start the lesson. So let's start with our writing warmup. Our writing Walmart is about, Show not tell. And we've looked at show not tell over the course of this unit before. Show not tell is a description of the characters' actions to describe their emotions rather than telling the reader their emotion. So for example, instead of saying the character is sad, we could say the characters' slump their shoulders and look down at the floor to tell the reader that they're feeling sad by describing their body language. So your task for your writing warmup is to match the emotion to the show not tell descriptions. So the emotions that we will be looking at are fear, anger and happiness. And the descriptions are he clenched his fist and gritted his teeth as his blood began to boil. His eyes widened and his hearts began to beat faster in his chest. And a smile spread across his face and he had a spring in his step. So pause the video to match the show not tell to the emotion and press play when you're ready to check your ideas. Okay, well done. Let's check. So the show not tell for fear was his eyes widened and his heart began to beat faster in his chest. For anger, he clenched his fist and gritted his teeth as his blood began to boil. And for happiness, a smile spread across his face and he had a spring in his step. In order to complete our planning, we'll need a table to organise our ideas. So I'd like you to draw a table with four rows and two columns. If you have a ruler, you can use it for this. Otherwise you can just draw neat straight lines as much as possible. So pause the video, draw your table with four rows and two lines and press play when you're ready to move on. Okay, fantastic job. So now we're going to watch the clip of the section of the film that we're going to be planning today. We're going to watch all the way from when Dodger first walks up to Oliver all the way until they walk through the marketplace. In our previous writing lesson and planning lesson, we plan the section that comes just before this, where we see the market go from early morning until later in the day, all the way until Dodger appears on the scene. And then now we're planning and writing Dodger talking to Oliver. So there's a lot of speech in this part of the film. And we'll talk about it a little bit more later, but when we write the speech, we can do something called paraphrasing. Which means that we don't always have to write the exact words that the characters are saying. We write what they meant and what their intention was. Perhaps changing the words a little bit and that's completely fine. So let's watch this section of the film again so that we can refresh in our minds what's happens.

Hello, my mate. And what's your game? You're not from these parts? Where are you from then?

I have been walking seven days.

Seven days? Cool. You must be hungry, want some grub? Then you shall have it. Come on. Up you get! On your pins. Oh, by the way, my name's Jack Dawkins. But I'm know as the Artful Dodger

Oliver Twist. Why are you known as the Artful Dodger?

That's why.

Great. I hope you enjoyed re-watching that section of the film. So now it's time for you to have a go at orally retelling the narrative. That means telling the story once again, adding in as much detail as possible. I've added in four different pictures to help you, but of course you know that a lot more happens than just these pictures and there's a lot of speech as well. So I want you to imagine that you're retelling the story to somebody who hasn't seen the film, who hasn't seen the pictures even, or doesn't know anything about the story. So lots and lots of detail so that they can picture the story really clearly in their minds. So pause the video to retell the story out loud and press play once you've finished. Fantastic, great effort. Thank you so much for doing that. That skill really will help you when you come to writing. Thinking lots of times about retelling the story helps us to remember the events and to add description. So now let's move on to our planning. So for our planning today, we're not going to watch a clip in between each part that we plan, because there is lots of dialogue where the characters are speaking. So for the first three sections of our planning, we're going to watch the clip once in a moment and think about all the different parts. And then we're just going to re-watch the next section, where they walk through the market place, right at the end before we can that section. So during the video, I suggest that if you need to, you can skip back in the video to find this part of the clip to remind yourself. So let's start by watching the section from when Dodger approaches Oliver all the way to when Oliver stands up.

Hello, My mate. And what's your game? You're not from these parts? Where you from then?

Have been walking seven days.

Seven days? Cool. You must be hungry. Want some grub? Then you shall have it. Come on. Up you get! On your pins

So the first part that we're going to think about is when Dodger walks up to Oliver, and we're going to think about the verbs and adverbs to describe his approach. So how he's moving. And then we're going to think carefully about the speech that he says. Remember, we don't have to write the exact words that Dodger says, we can paraphrase, which means we can give the same meaning, but using different words. So I'd like you to pause the video and to try and fill out your two sections of your plan about this part of the film. So thinking about how he moves, I know that I'm thinking that he strides. So he strode past tense. He strode confidently. So he's walking confidently. I know that he looked at Oliver and carefully or he scrutinised Oliver carefully, so he's looking in a lot of detail. And perhaps in thinking about the speech, he says, hello, my man. And we need to think about what he does at the same time. So, "Hello my man", said Dodger as he looked at Oliver carefully. So I'd like you to pause the video, to have a go at filling in these two sections of your plan, thinking about movements with verbs and adverbs, and thinking about speech in complex sentences. Which we have practised in lesson four of this unit. So if you're feeling unsure about your speech punctuation, that would be a good lesson to watch before we move on to writing in lesson number 10, because we will definitely be including speech in our writing. So it's a good idea to revise that in lesson number four of this unit. So pausing the video to fill out these two parts of your plan and press play when you're ready to move on. Fantastic, really good job. So I wonder what different thoughts you had on this section. So some of the verbs and adverbs that I thought of to describe Dodger's approach were that he paced confidently up to Oliver. Paced is a way of walking at pace means quick and confidently shows that he's feeling sure of himself. He's feeling confident. He slowly approached Oliver, so he didn't run towards him. And although he's walking confidently, he approached him slowly. He glanced curiously at the scruffy boy. So a little bit more detail there. So to glance is to look quickly and curiously means you're interested. And then looked suspiciously at Oliver. So if you're suspicious, you're not sure about something. Something seems a little bit off. And I think that Dodger is very intrigued by Oliver. And he's wondering what he's doing there. So he might look at him suspiciously. Some of the speech that he said was, "Hello mate. What's your game?" And I've extended that by saying, asked Dodger with suspicion in his voice as he looked the orphan up and down. So I've extended that like we practised in lesson four, adding in more detail about what is happening alongside the speech so that when I'm reading and when my reader is reading my writing, they can hear the dialogue so they can hear what's being said, but they can also imagine what's happening around it. Or perhaps he continued by saying, "Where are you from then? He continued when the timid boy did not answer. Remember timid means shy. And I've added more detail to say that he said this next sentence because Oliver didn't answer. So looking back at our speech, punctuation, the words that are said by the character are in inverted commas, in speech marks, not the words that are not said by the character. Asked Dodger. Dodger doesn't say those words. So they're not inside the inverted commas. Making sure that at the start of our speech sentence. So the words the character is saying, we have a capital letter to show that's the start of their sentence, as well as our punctuation inside the inverted commas as well to show their full sentence. Okay. So if there's anything that you would like to take from my plan to include, in addition to your own ideas, then please pause the video and copy down any ideas now and press play when you're ready to move on. Okay, fantastic. Thank you very much for pausing and pressing play. So next section, we're going to think about Oliver's reactions. So how he reacts to Dodger. Reacting means how you behave after something's happened. So this is his behaviour. What we can see in his expression in his body as Dodger has come to speak to him. So we're going to think about his appearance. So adjectives and nouns to describe his appearance. You might describe his feet or his clothes or his face or his eyes. And then we're going to think about show not tell, to show how he's feeling without telling the reader he is scared, he is worried, he is unsure. We can show all of that by describing his body language. So he looked blankly and blinked at the stranger. That tells me that he doesn't quite know what to do. So remember, we're not going to re-watch the film, but if you feel like you need to skip back, then you can do that. But then come back to this part of the lessons. So perhaps look at the time before you skip back and then you can include your ideas. So I'd like you to pause the video, to include ideas of Oliver's appearance and ideas of show not tell and then press play when you're ready to move on. Okay, fantastic. So some of the things that I thought of for Oliver's appearance and I wonder if they're similar to what you thought is that he had dirty blistered feet. So blister is when your shoes don't fit properly, you get a blister. But you might also get to blister if you're walking barefoot, like Oliver did. And ragged, torn clothes. So they look quite scruffy and they look like, he's been wearing them for a long time. Which is understandable in his case. You might have come up with adjectives, like exhausted, hopeless or timid. So he looks exhausted. He looks hopeless. Remember that suffix less, tells us without something. So he doesn't have any hope left. And he looks timid. He looks shy. He has a dirt-streaked face. So he hasn't washed in a while because he's been walking. He tells us the seven days in the video. So we can describe his face as being dirt-streak. He is a lonely lost boy. We could sure not tell by saying that he's speechless. And often if a person is speechless, that tells us a lot about their emotions, they're either shocked or worried or really thinking about what to say next. He's frozen to the spot. So that definitely tells me how he's feeling. He's wide-eyed. So how do you think that you might feel if you're wide-eyed? You might feel surprised or unsure? He scared to say the wrong thing. And he talks when he does talk in a quiet, timid voice. A quiet, shy voice, which tells us that he's not feeling very confident. So if you'd like to take anything from my plan and add it to your own ideas, then please pause the video and do that now . Okay, fantastic. Let's move on to our third section before we re-watch the final part. So now we're thinking about Dodger offering to Oliver to come and get some food with him. So the first thing we want to think about is some speech in complex sentences to add some detail. And we want to think about Oliver's reaction to the offer as well. So remember, if you want to re-watch the clip, then you can skip back in the video, just make sure that you look at the time on the video so that you can come back to this point when you're ready. So what I'd like you to do now is to pause the video, to write into your plan, your ideas for the speech that Dodger says and your ideas for Oliver's reaction. And then you can press play when you're ready to move on. Remember with speech, we don't have to say the exact words, we can paraphrase, which means that we can give different words that convey, that gives the same meaning. So pause the video to include your ideas and press play when you're ready to move on. Okay, fantastic. So some of the speech that I included was, "You must be hungry. Want some grub?" Grub is a different word that means food. So, "You must be hungry. Want some grub? Then you shall have it" asserted Dodger because he felt sorry for the helpless boy. So I've included a subordinate clause. It starts with a subordinating junction because, conjunction, sorry. Because to give more detail. And I said asserted instead of said, because that tells me that he said it in a confident way. And I've got my speech punctuation in there correctly as well. Then he also says, "Up you get! On your pins." He instructed joyfully. Now, remember when we had speech first, which is when our speech that the character says comes before we say, who said it and how they said it, we can't have a full stop in there. We can have an explanation mark. We can have a question mark, like we have above, but we can't have a full stop. So we use a comma instead. Like you can see there. And when you've watched, you thought, what does he mean by on your pins? He means on your legs. That's another way of saying on your legs. So some verbs and adverbs. Oliver nodded gratefully. So he feels very grateful means he wants to say, thank you. He stood up uneasily. He was wary. So remember that word wary, means you're unsure. But he followed hopefully, so full of hope. If you're feeling hopeful. He heaved himself up off the ground. If you heave something, it means it's very heavy or it's a big effort. So if heaved himself off the ground, means it was a big effort for him to do so. And he struggled to walk at first. So it was very difficult for him to walk at first. So if there's anything that I've got in my plan that you'd like to include and add to your own ideas, then please pause the video and do that now. Okay, fantastic. Now for our final section, we're going to re-watch this final section as they walk through the market. We're going to think about some speech in complex sentences to add details. So there's a dialogue here, which means there's a conversation between the two characters. Remember, we don't need to copy down and write down all of the exact words that they say. We can paraphrase so we can get the same meaning by using our own words. And we're going to think as well about some show not tell to show the character's emotions. So let's re-watch this section of the film.

Oh, by the way my name's Jack Dawkins. But I'm know as the Artful Dodger.

Oliver Twist.

Why are you known as the Artful Dodger?

That's why

Fantastic. So now that we re-watched this section of the film, I'd like you to pause the video and include your speech in one of your boxes on your table and some show not tell, to show the characters emotions in the other side of your table. So press play when you're ready to move on. Okay, let me share with you some of my ideas for speech. So there's a lot of speech in this section, the two characters talk to each other. But here are some of the ideas that I had. "By the way my name's Jack Dawkins," explained Dodger as he swiped a loaf of bread with one hand and offered the other to Oliver. So he stealing with one arm and handshaking with the other. After the boy had turned around, Oliver asked, "Why are you known as the Artful Dodger?" So we're adding more detail with our subordinate clauses. A smile spread across Dodger's face as he extended the bread towards Oliver and beamed. That means he's saying it in a happy way. "That's why." so he's proud of himself because he's stolen the bread. And that's where he gets his name, the Artful Dodger from. So some show not tell to show the character's emotions. Dodger grinned from ear to ear. That tells me that he's very happy, his smile almost covers his whole face. And he held himself confidently. So he's pretty proud of himself and he feels comfortable doing what he's doing. Oliver shuffled nervously behind. So he's not striding confidently like Dodger. He's sort of walking a bit nervously. So that shows us that he's not feeling as confident. And then Oliver gasped when he saw the bread. So he's surprised, huh! If you gasp, you're surprised. So if there's anything in my plan that you'd like to add to your own ideas in your plan, then please pause the video now, write them down and press play when you're ready to move on. Okay, fantastic. So we have completed all of the sections of our lesson today, and hopefully you have got in front of you a plan with four sections that will help us hugely when we come to do our writing in lesson 10. So hold on to that. So really well done for all of your hard work today, you've worked really, really hard. If you'd like to, please absolutely share what you have learned with your parent or carer. And perhaps you can tell them the new word that you've learned in today's planning lesson. I will see you soon for another lesson on Oliver Twist. Bye.

To plan the second part of a narrative scene

To plan the second part of a narrative scene

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UnitEnglish / Oliver - Narrative writing

English